Last week was hard. A week ago last Friday, Beau received a call from a good friend from high school informing him one of their closest friends, Aaron, had passed away unexpectedly while surprising his mom with a visit to his childhood home in Spencer. Aaron was a creative, vibrant, hilariously funny man, a theater teacher who was adored at his high school in Colorado, recently engaged to an equally creative and witty, Meredith, and a dear friend to Beau for many years. This was the first time Beau had lost a friend, the first time he was asked to serve as a pallbearer, the first time I've had to watch him process and grieve the loss of someone so young like this. Our usually upbeat, strong, and silly daddy was sad, and it was hard for all of us to watch and not be able to help. Sometimes, there just aren't a lot of words, but we did our best to let him know we were there while giving him the space to remember Aaron and reconnect with so many of his old friends from near and far who came to say goodbye to their friend.
I held down the fort at home last week, volunteering as a crew member for the Rad Bats at Orchard's Vacation Bible School. Every night around 5:00, the three of us joined a community of families for dinner and a night of wild and crazy worship with hundreds of kids of all ages. I was amazed once again at Orchard's focus on family. Volunteers prepared a different meal for VBS volunteers and their families every single night prior to the start, and Deb Lindaman, Mila's teacher in the two year old room on Sunday mornings, volunteered to host a mini VBS for the toddlers whose parents were volunteering. So not only did Cruz get to attend a week of VBS, but Mila also got to be part of the festivities. It was an exhausting week (I'm convinced God gives all preschool teachers a special room in Heaven), but a completely rewarding one for us to be part of together. It was so fun to be there with both of my kids this year, great to connect with more parents and volunteers I see every week but haven't gotten to know, and cup-filling to leave every night at dusk, still singing the songs we learned so well and tucking two exhausted little disciples in their beds.
And then there was Wednesday. Beau was scheduled to return after what I knew would be an exhausting three days of a trip to Spencer for the visitation, funeral, and several reunions with friends he hadn't seen in years. Knowing he would be tired but excited to see the kids, I sent him a text during our final worship time at VBS, asking him to pick up four chocolate shakes and meet us at the top of the big hill on the edge of our neighborhood. A half hour later, we had our own reunion, just in time for the sunset.
The number of days we get to spend on this side of Heaven is not up to us, but how we spend each one we get absolutely is. And for now, eating chocolate shakes and watching the sunset with these three is exactly how I long to spend my days. That grassy hill that gets us high enough to spot the very top of our roof, Mila's curls and Cruz's brown eyes, Beau's dimples and the way he throws them up on his shoulders, and that time of day where the sun and moon meet in the sky, these simple nights are what this life is about.
"I believe that if we cultivate a true attention, a deep ability to see what has been there all along, we will find worlds within us and between us, dreams and stories and memories spilling over. The nuances and shades and secrets and intimations of love and friendship and marriage and parenting are action-packed and multicolored, if you know where to look."
-Shauna Niequist
287. Slow mornings of letting the kids sleep in, soft blankies, and requests to "cover me up", followed by bowls of cereal, Daniel Tiger, and sofa snuggles as we check the forecast and plan our day.
288. That one brisk June morning, where we wore our sweatshirts and were the only three people on Main Street. Snickerdoodle cookies and apple juice treats for breakfast, Mila disrupting the peace for the regulars at Cup of Joe, and smiles amidst the controlled chaos of kids home for the summer.
289. Signing not one, but two little readers up for summer reading this year. Stickers and fill-in-the-dots for every ten minutes done, Barnacle is Bored for Cruz and Goldilocks for Mila, and story-time with Lou, our wonderful elementary librarian from Price Lab. Sitting behind the two of them as they stuck close together and listened better than all the regulars. They've got this story-time thing down pat. :)
290. Crockpot meals put together at the beginning of the day, intentionally planned to include lots of fresh greens from the garden -- cilantro on carnitas, mint in the water, kale in the smoothies. Barefoot walks to the garden with my colander and afternoon drinks for thirsty plants.
291. Post nap trips for ice cream. Little biking shorts and jelly sandals. White against sun-kissed skin. And that one time last week when Mila let me put her hair up.
292. Polka dot jammies and lazy Saturdays. Early morning dates with Cruz as we drive around looking for hot air balloons and come home with donuts instead. We'll catch them one of these years...
293. My favorite window box to date. The way you can see them from Mila's window seat. Afternoon doorbell rings from our neighbor Rush to see if Cruz can play. Cul de sac gatherings of neighors while the kids chase Copper and the adults wonder where all these kids are going to park in a decade or so...
294. They way I catch them sometimes, completely unprompted.
295. This labor of love. For friends like Bill, Aram, and Brian who came to help Beau assemble during the hottest weekend of year, and the impromptu barbecue we had to celebrate its completion last Saturday night.
296. A welcomed rainy Sunday with closets to clean. A color-coded Lego system that makes this mama a little too happy and a newly organized closet for Cruz that I go in and stare at when in need of a little inspiration.
297. Rediscovered toys on quiet afternoons while Mila naps.
298. Swing set play in pajamas and breakfast for four on the top landing. And when it's too hot to slide, we turned it into a water slide.
299. Completed house projects and date nights around the fire pit. Pinot Noir, sweatshirt blankets, and outdoor sofas under the stars. Reminiscing about that very first fire pit on our driveway on Fareway Lane and all the nights and plans we plotted together. And now, more dreams and plans plotted while the kids sleep upstairs.
300. Dinners outside at Susongs and a mani/pedi for Mila girl. While the adults dined on cajun shrimp, smoked brisket, and watermelon cocktails, Molly and her friend Sophia kept Mila busy with a full on spa night, complete with three colors of nail polish, peppermint lotion for her legs, and even a little foot filing! I've never seen her hold so still. :)
