Dear Cruz...

Hi baby,

This week, as we say goodbye to your fourth month, I can't help but feel a little nostalgic.  I'm not sure if it has to do with Chris and Windee welcoming their new little arrival this week, or attending a baby shower, or getting caught up in the videos we took of you during your first few weeks of life, but I'm having some baby fever and wishing I could snap my fingers and hold you when you were a week old.  When I look back at that time of your birth, everything was so new, so fresh, and so unreal, that it's hard to remember the details.  Now that I've had time to break in these mama shoes of mine, I do wish I could go back from time to time and just look in on you when you were so tiny.  

You are just changing so much, growing and learning more every day, and sometimes, I feel my head spinning trying to keep up with you and stay 'in the moment' amidst all that is life.  Life is so busy and I just wish I could stop time every now and then.  Keep you as you are until I'm ready to see the next stage.  It just goes so quick...it seems like every day, you're doing something new and I blink and it's gone. 

What a fun fourth month you had!  Your smiles are constant and so contagious.  You know exactly how to charm your dad and I.  Your giggle melts us and you've become such a funny little addition to our family.  You just belong.  We've melded together into this little unit that just works.  We work like pretzels and peanut butter, strawberries and chocolate, and freezy pops and summertime. 

I know that I cannot stop time, but I can control what I do with the time I have every day.  It's about cherishing every detail of this time in our lives.  This time of discovering how to be parents, discovering how to raise a child, and discovering how to balance and make the most of this time we have together.  You challenge me to be a better mom and a better human being every day, and little by little, I'm learning.

So in short, I know you don't have much control over this one, but please don't grow up too fast.  Don't grow tired of cuddling with your mommy after work.  Don't stop giggling that little burly laugh when your dad and I rub our foreheads in your tummy.  Don't lose your wondrous fascination with the world around you.  And don't you lose those forehead wrinkles.  Stay small, at least until I can figure out how to soak up and remember every piece of you...

Love you to pieces and pieces...

Mom

The Big FOUR!

On Saturday, we celebrated Cruz's four month birthday.  He is a third of the way through his first year and growing every day.  It's crazy to think that just one month ago, I was saying goodbye to my simple days at home and beginning to live the life of a working mom, and now, four weeks later, I can't remember life before this stage.  We've pieced together a morning routine that involves a lot of teamwork, my transition back to school has been easier than expected (I tend to be a bit of a pessimist sometimes), and day care seems to be a positive experience for our little boy.  I think it has something to do with the cute girls that work there ;).

I know I will catch myself saying this every month, but I think four months is my new favorite stage.  Lately, I can't play or interact with Cruz without shaking my head in amazement at his growth and development.  As he figures out the world around him, he's becoming quite the little person.  He smiles, he giggles, he smacks his lips together and makes fish faces, and he loves talking to his mama and daddy.  And although we're both sad to leave our little nugget at day care every day, it makes us appreciate our nights with him even more.  The family time the three of us have together are the times that will define this stage in my life twenty years from now.  The time I will always look back on and smile.  And probably achingly miss...

 

Cruz at Four Months...

Where do I start?  Cruz's biggest accomplishment this month was probably learning to roll over.  At 12 weeks, he was trying his hardest to conquer this feat, and would twist his entire body in the most awkward position, only to get stuck on his arm.  At 14 weeks, we watched Cruz roll from his tummy to his back with enough ease to convince us he'd been doing it forever.  After his inaugural tummy roll, the next morning, I peeked in Cruz's room and found him sound asleep on his tummy.  I thought we had discovered a new sleep position; however, he's not much for routine.  Some mornings I find him on his tummy, some on the opposite side of his crib, and some with his little head on the other end of the crib.  

Speaking of sleep, Cruz is a professional.  Last night, he slept 11 hours straight!  We gave him a bottle at 7 and he fell asleep.  At 7:30, we attempted to wake him up, but after tickling his feet, whispering in his ear, and changing positions nearly thirty times, we gave up and decided to see what happened when we put him in his crib.  At 6:30 the next morning, I had to wake him up!  He loves his crib, and who can blame him?  His daddy worked hard on it.  

Perhaps the funniest milestone this month was the discovery of splashing in the whale tub.  It started rather timid, with a sudo-deliberate hand tap or light kick in the sudsy water.  Then, one Saturday morning, Cruz became a bit gutsier.  I was soaked, the floor was soaked, the glass on the window was dripping in baby bath, and Cruz was soaked.  He couldn't even keep his eyes open because he was splashing so much.  He's all business while he's splashing and saying bathtime has become more entertaining is an understatement!

Cruz has always been a man of many faces, and now he is a man of many noises!  What started as cute baby coos has now morphed into shrieks, gurgles, and flat-out yelling!  He just recently discovered how to giggle, yet we can't make him laugh without giving him the hiccups too.  I love his hoarse, burly little laugh and could waste hours attempting to hear it!

Cruz tries hard to prove he is a 'big boy' in many ways.  He sits in his bumbo seat while we prepare supper, attempts to hold his bottle during feedings, and can now keep his head nice and strong while I hold him on my hip.  Despite, his attempts to grow up faster than his mom wishes, he still holds onto lots of sweet characteristics that make him remain 'baby.'  He loves to cuddle, especially when he's getting sleepy.  He'll snuggle in close and always grab onto our shirt collar, a sweatshirt drawstring, or a necklace.  I'm convinced there's nothing better than these moments...

 

Other 'firsts' this month include Cruz's first cold, his first bowl of rice cereal, and his first Bears NFC Championship game.  We're convinced teeth are in the near future, as Cruz can't seem to go five minutes without a hand, finger, or toy shoved in his mouth.  He chews hard, drools like crazy, and will try and eat anything that gets within five inches from his face.  He looks like a baby bird!

 

Yes, our little peanut is growing into a little person as every month goes by.  A little person who loves to play, loves to smile, and loves to sleep.  A little person who will sleep 11 hours straight in his crib at night, yet won't last five minutes during the day.  A little person who loves books. stuffed animals, and tricep extensions with Dad.  A little person in major need of a Baby Gap 'Tall.'  

We love you, little person.