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"a portrait of each of my children, once each week, in 2014"
 

Mila: We baptized this precious girl on Sunday and it was one of the best days.  She wore the dress I wore when I was baptized and a little white cardigan over top to conceal the white satin ribbon she wanted to eat.  I won't forget how sweet she looked with her gray tights under that eyelet trimmed skirt and her pearl bracelet around her tiny wrist. 

Cruz: We took this kid to Las Margaritas for Cinco de Mayo last night.  He ate an entire cheese quesadilla and downed a glass of chocolate milk.  Afterwards, we got out the sombreros and as I was snapping this picture of him, I had a moment of deja vu as I remembered an earlier version of this brown eyed boy in the same sombrero.  I went digging for the picture and found this.  Dressed in gray and everything!

Maybe a glimpse of his sister in a few months...

Weekly Mila Fix

Musings...

Thinking back to // our weekend.  It was full of all my favorite things.  Friday night, we entrusted our kids to Miss Jennifer, our faithful and loved baby-sitter since Cruz was a baby.  This was Mila's first chance to be under the care of someone other than family, and we are so thankful to have someone so capable of watching our littles so the two of us can reconnect and enjoy a meal without bouncing a baby or coercing a three year old to try his vegetables.  It was beautiful outside and we spent the night on the parkade.  We had drinks on the back patio at Tony's Pizzeria, ate ourselves silly at the Montage, and ended the night with beers at Single Speed.  And we returned home to two sleeping babies tucked away in their beds.

Saturday included a road trip to Des Moines to shop for Mila's baptism party this Sunday.  It was a quick trip, but a fun one - we hit super sales at Baby Gap, I stocked up on peach salsa and cheap wine at Trader Joe's, and we picked up some fun and unique treats for Mila's baptism table on Sunday. 

After missing my kids after a day away on Saturday, Sunday's cold and rainy forecast was the perfect invitation to stay inside all day.  We ended the weekend in my favorite way - a pajama and popcorn movie night followed by a dance party to "Let it Go" before bed.  All of us in sweats, each with our own bowl of buttery popcorn, with a baby sandwiched in between on us on the couch will forever be one of my favorite snapshots of family life.   

The best kind of weekend - quality time with my main squeeze, my babes, and even some time to myself.      

Looking ahead to // The month of May.  Spring tends to start a little dreary and dirty, but it all starts to turn around in the month of May.  May means blossoms on Seerley Blvd. and the end of another semester.  It means packing away those winter coats and carrying lighter loads in the car seat.  It means sandals and skirts and cotton dresses for Mila and the start of another summer bucket list taped to our chalkboard wall.  It's the start of the carefree days of summertime and lots of new adventures with this family of mine.  We have so much in store for our summer. 

Eating // Our dinner schedule was a little sporadic after Mila was born, but we've finally found our groove around here again and I'm once again enjoying my meal planning, grocery listing, and clean eating endeavors around here.  As we plan to plant our garden in the near future, I'm motivated to find creative ways to put our produce to good use and not let it go to waste this year.  I'm finding success in a few little things that help me stay intentional and eat healthy during the week.  I've been cooking chicken breasts on Sunday and dicing them up to mix with leftover vegetables or invent a chicken salad to eat for lunch during the week.  And since Saturday is typically my grocery shopping day, we've been using Friday as our clean out day - taking all the leftover produce and either stir-frying it with our favorite sauce or making a cold quinoa salad for lunch.  This week, I enjoyed this curried chicken salad on arugula and mixed the rest of my chicken with some leftover broccoli and brown rice.    

Watching // I look forward every week to a new episode of Game of Thrones and am excitedly anticipating the return of Jack Bauer in a new season of 24.  Beau and I used to go on 24 binges when we were first married and I've missed the sound of that stopwatch ticking before every commercial break.  When it's not a bunch of walker zombies attempting to eat Rick and his clan, it's Jack Bauer attempting to stop the next terrorist threat.  We're suckers for good tv, I tell ya. :)

Loving // the new Target maxi skirt I scored for $17.99.  I, of course, went to Target to return an item and left spending two times more than I walked in with.  I wasn't even intending to shop but I curse those brilliant marketing placement people for putting this skirt right on the aisle next to that really cute pair of sandals.  I also bought a cake pan, a $1.99 Avengers Assemble placemat for Cruz, and a swim cap for Mila.  She wore it in the tub the other night and looked like Esther Williams.  And Cruz cleaned his entire plate because I kept telling him Thor and the Hulk were watching him and cheering him on from his placemat.  Turns out I may have a future in product placement as well...

Feeling // Content and maybe happier than I've ever been.  I'm in a good place right now and I keep having these moments where I stop and let it set in.  These are days I will look back and remember as some of the best. 

A few pictures of our week...

Bath Time

There is perhaps no greater picture of the place I am at in my life right now than bath night.  After supper is cleaned up and leftovers are put away, we move on to the kids.  I am on a mission, filling tubs with far more bubbles than necessary, getting the temperature just right, and immersing my two precious babes into a warm cocoon of scented suds, soft wash clothes, and a much-needed wind down to another day.  Their baths become yet another canvas that tells the story of motherhood, of this selfless yet so fulfilling place I am at in my life.  Showers for me happen less often than they used to and serve as nothing more than a quick means to get clean, but baths for my loves become a sanctuary - a sacred place in our life's story that is one of the truest pictures of all the good.  No matter how crabby one of them is, the moment their toes hit the water it seems they are covered in this blanket of peace and security.  Cruz immediately dives into a world of imaginative play, where blocks become the "ideas" of Batman and Wonder Woman, and a plate of colored shaving cream becomes the palette of Picasso himself.  In the bath, Mila exerts everything that is good about a baby, her chubby cheeks resting on her chest and her eyes staring so intently at the textbook in front of her - her feet, her fists, her mom.  Suddenly, she kicks her feet and splashes water on her face, her concentration turning to surprise and then pride in the discovery she just made.  And me?  I breathe in the lavender bath suds, let the warm water wash over my hands as I wash them, and feel renewed.  I feel myself falling deeper in love with them, a feeling that happens several times when you are a mom.

After a proper soaking comes the work I'm really good at.  I wash between Mila's baby rolls, the rubber bands around her wrists and the soft chub on her thighs.  I wash in between her toes, behind her ears, and that place under her neck that makes her open her mouth in response like a baby bird looking for a worm.  I smile, she smiles.  I wrap her body tightly in a fresh towel, then go to work to make her warm and cozy, always wrapping her up in a new blankie and cradling her tightly for awhile.

Cruz's bathing process is similar.  I use a towel to wipe the ledge of the tub and sit in an awkward position in order to reach him.  We play a game of tug of war, attempting to wash him while he fights to stack blocks, float boats, or wash the paint off the side of the shower with his washcloth.  We sing as I scrub his head with shampoo, making sure he tips his head back far enough to avoid water in his eyes.  And then, as always, he pulls the plug and I rinse him off, wrapping him in a towel before he runs into the living room and sprawls out on the living room floor, waiting to be lathered in lotion.  These small gestures become an act of love for them, another attempt to show them how important they are to me.  And as I smell their newly washed heads, watch Cruz jump on our bed in his striped pajamas, and cuddle this baby of mine in her Dreft-scented footed sleeper, I feel every stress, insecurity, or uncertainty of the day wash away like dirt down a drain.  I feel important, purposeful, and beautiful, called to take care of two of God's masterpieces.  This place, just loving them and taking care of them is the most important work I will ever do.

And then comes bedtime stories.  Lately we've been doing this as a family, all four of us trudging up the stairs together to Cruz's cozy room.  He picks out his allotted three books and we prop Mila up on a pillow next to Cruz as Beau and I face them and read Cruz's favorite books about Dr. Doom, Snatchabook, and bear hunts.  Mila feels so important in this moment, her eyes traveling from Beau, to Cruz, to me, and then the pages of the book, following along and absorbing more than I can comprehend.  Sometimes Cruz wants to read to us and I sink into Beau's chest and drink in his sweet, three year old voice as he says big words like magnetism and abomination.  I laugh, I grow a little impatient when Cruz drags out his usual routine of one more story, one more cup of water, one more potty break, but most of all, I sit up there in that dimly lit room and I feel happier than I have ever felt in my entire life.

I peak in and take a moment to watch them sleep, Cruz hugging his Lightning McQueen and Mila sleeping like an angel in her sleep sack, the Avett Brothers playing softly from the kindle propped in her crib, and I am reminded I will only have them like this for so long.  All too soon, they will take showers and not need me to tuck them in or rock them to sleep.  There won't be books before bed or that little voice at the top of the stairs saying, "Mommy, I need to go potty," even though he went just ten minutes before.  Someday, they won't need me the way they do, so for now, I bathe, I lotion, I rock, I read and I thank God for these important days of being everything they need.   

  

Images from Mila's newborn session, finally getting around to posting.  Thanks to Darcy from At Play Photo for chronicling our family's story since 2010...