"Hygge is about an atmosphere and an experience, rather than about things. It is about being with the people we love. A feeling of home. A feeling that we are safe, that we are shielded from the world and allow ourselves to let our guard down. You may be having an endless conversation about the small or big things in life - or just be comfortable in each other's silent company - or simply just be by yourself enjoying a cup of tea."
I have a feeling if I traced my roots through Ancestry DNA, there would most likely be some Denmark ties weaved in to my heavy German background somewhere. Whether or not that's true, I am happy to report that I did marry a blond-haired, sparkly blue-eyed Dane, so hopefully our kids will inherit some of the things I'm learning I have quite in common with the Danes.
I say all this because I've recently been reading all about Hygge, pronounced hoo-ga, a term or approach to living that the Danes have become quite famous for. Author, Meik Wiking, set out to study the Danish culture because "the country of Denmark consistently ranks among the happiest nations in the world." Sure, they face challenges and issues like any other country, but Wiking and many others found Denmark to be a source of inspiration for how countries can increase the quality of life of their citizens.
Their answer: Cozy
They may call it something different, but the Danes know how to home really well. They live in a climate similar to ours, with even longer seasons of darkness, and "hygge becomes the antidote to the cold winter, the rainy days, and the duvet of darkness." They light candles and cook stew, wear thick sweaters and sip tea, and value intimate over flashy, stories over social media. Amen to all that!
I've been choosing to read a chapter of Wiking's book every night and have underlined nearly every line of it. The Danes are speaking my language and I love how Wiking describes this approach as something that takes awareness and intention. The seasons change and instead of reacting to them, we can create homes that anticipate them. And when we anticipate, we create a sparkle, a magic, a happiness. If we can make our homes a reflection of that magic, I have a feeling that could lead to a whole lot of happiness.
The Hygge Manifesto includes ten characteristics of how you can create this way of living in your own surroundings. It got me thinking of ways I intentionally prepare for fall and winter and unlike so many others, I actually anticipate the season of cold and dark. Here's the Hygge manifesto:
1. Atmosphere (Turn down the lights.)
2. Presence (Be here now. Turn off the phones.)
3. Pleasure (Coffee, chocolate, cookies. Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!)
4. Equality ("We" over "me." Share the tasks and the airtime.)
5. Gratitude (Take it in. This might be as good as it gets.)
6. Harmony (It's not a competition. We already like you.)
7. Comfort (Get comfy. Take a break. It's all about relaxation.)
8. Truce (No drama. Let's discuss politics another day.)
9. Togetherness (Build relationships and narratives. "Do you remember the time when...?")
10. Shelter (This is your tribe. This is a place of peace and security.)
Ahhh, doesn't that just sound nice?! I might just hang it on the wall somewhere. On the first cold day of fall, I turned on the fireplace, lit a few candles, and sat down with a cup of tea and my notebook to jot down a few things of how I prepare for this season of fall and the winter that will surely follow. With the start of the school year along with many accompanying activities, fall is busy and short and without some intention, we can miss it. Here is my own manifesto of how I prepare to live best as the seasons change...
1. Experience || Make a simple bucket list and display it. Include yearly traditions like apple picking and pumpkin patches, but invent new seasonal experiences to get outside your comfort zone. Create experiences that can be done under your roof and in your own backyard, as well as seasonal adventures to anticipate and look forward to. We are anticipating a concert or two, a movie night, and a weekend getaway just as the leaves change.
2. All the scents || Fall is the best time of year to turn up your nose to all the smells of the season. I actually look forward to washing dishes or cleaning floors when Meyer's Apple Cider scented dish soap comes on the market! It smells amazing! Other favorites include Bath and Body Works' "Leaves" and "Vanilla Pumpkin."
3. Call it Comfort Food || Grab a good cookbook and spend some time listing out meals that will warm your heart and your tummy. It's so easy this time of year. Soups and roasts and slow cooker meals can be made ahead and savored after a day at work and they make your house smell amazing. We drink a lot of red wine in the fall, I try and make one soup a week, and like to have some sort of baked good at the ready, whether it's something made by me or something made at a store. I just purchased Hy-Vee's apple glazed donuts and they are amazing!
4. Grab a Blanket and a Good Book || Make time to curl up and read something good. I keep a box of fall children's books packed away in storage and put them in a big basket by the fireplace as soon as September rolls around. Then we visit Barnes and Noble and find one or two more to add to our collection each season. These books become staples we look forward to each year - Creepy Carrots for Cruz, and Goodbye Summer, Hello Fall for Mila. We created an entire space devote to curling up with a good book. It's real around here.
5. Stay Home || I love all the fun celebrations you can stay busy with in our city this time of year, but also want to prioritize time to be home, our favorite place of all. We're going to try and commit to a Friday night pizza and movie night, stay-at-home date nights around the fire, Sunday crafts at the table, and afternoon naps and football. When my kids grow up, I want them to have many memories of adventures, but I hope their favorite memories happen right here at home.
6. Make it Pretty || My tastes on decorating have changed over the years and I used to get a little stressed hauling up boxes of fake pumpkins and garlands and feeling obligated to change everything out for a short two months before everything comes down again for Christmas. This year, I added a few fall accents that blended well with my current spread, tried to focus on things that make my senses like (candles and blankets and pillows), and focused on earthy things that can be tossed at the end of the season instead of taking up more space in storage. And I finally came to the conclusion that I've never been a fan of red or orange, going for muted pumpkins and beautiful lavender mums on the porch. Everything feels more like me this year.
7. Gather || While summertime calls for late nights outside, I love that this season invites us back in, around the table in smaller, more intimate ways. I love using this home of ours as a place to love on and serve other people - whether that's with a good cheese board on the deck, soup and games of 500, or a traditional Thanksgiving feast around the table. Turn on some Otis Redding, pour a whiskey drink, and spend some time with people you can be you with. Because sharing our homes, our tables, and these seasons with others is what the Danes would say "it's generous and celebratory, a way to remember the importance of the simple act of living itself."
I'll try and share more Hygge tips as the leaves change. But for now, grab and blanket and something hot to drink - it might even frost tonight. ;)
