Sunday, July 13, 2014

Happy Half Birthday, Mila Carys

Mila Carys, today you are six months old, halfway through your first year of life.  It seems like just yesterday you were still in my tummy and I was anxiously awaiting your arrival, wondering how on earth I was going to do this life with two thing.  I was so excited to meet you, to hold you and kiss your cheeks, but I was also very nervous, doubting my ability to balance my time between two little souls and still be the kind of mommy I wanted to be.  And then, on that cold and windy day in January, you came into this world easy as pie, a tiny little six pound nugget who I instantly felt such a love for.  You slept the entire first night, cried for most of the second day, and we fearfully opened up our hearts to a baby girl that swept all three of us away.

That all seems like such a lifetime ago.  I stare at that memory of that worrisome mommy to just Cruz and feel so proud of how far our family has come in the last six months.  There have been days, let me tell you, but for the most part, you have seamlessly filled this piece of our family that I didn't even know existed.  You are the sweetest, best behaved little baby and you have been so easy on your mama.  Sometime, I think it's because you know.  Our bond is strong, our connection is forever, and it seems as if we have this mutual understanding that we just need one another.    

I love the rhythm of our life right now.  I love the chaos of preparing breakfast for the two of you, how you open your mouth like a little baby bird and seem to savor every single bite of your peas, or turnips, or whatever it is I've fixed for your supper.  I love the way you fit on my hip as I carry you around the house.  I love watching your eyelids get heavy as you drift to sleep in my arms, and the way you always crank your neck and turn to the side when I lay you in your crib.  I love watching you sleep, your chubby arms wrapped around your muslin blanket, your chest gently rising up and down as you breathe softly.  I love the way your eyes light up when you jump, or when I'm about to pull you out of your car seat, or when I turn on the faucet to rinse you from your bath.  I love how you recognize my voice instantly, how you constantly try to eat my chin, and how your entire face smiles when Cruz is nose to nose with you.

I give thanks for the last six months, for they have truly been a test in the best way.  They have taught me the power of patience and laughter in those moments that seem to be unraveling.  They have been full of grace in those every day moments where I take care of two of God's little gifts.  And they have introduced me to a whole new kind of love.  Although it's been overwhelming and utterly exhausting at times, these are the sweetest moments of my life.


Happy Half Birthday, Mila.  I love you more than you will ever know.

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